Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize