last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
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Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
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he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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