This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
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