we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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