When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Randomize