Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
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