Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
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I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
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I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?