Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
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Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
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the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
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