He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
