i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
There are leaves in my underwear?
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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