the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.