brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Randomize
