White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
