wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Randomize