I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
21 Dirty Secrets From Bachelor/Bachelorette Parties That Have Destroyed Marriages
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
23 Fathers Confess The Best Way They’ve Messed With Their Daughter’s Boyfriend
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
Randomize
