If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
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