VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
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