I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
Randomize