the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
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He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
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My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.