She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
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She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
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The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
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