i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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