i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
