This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
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