i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
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