He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
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Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
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I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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