I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
I just want nice things and good sex
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Randomize
