I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Randomize
