Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
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