We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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