On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Randomize
