Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
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