So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
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Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
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I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
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