Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
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Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
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You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.