i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
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