so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus