I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
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