sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
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I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
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The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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