Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(313): View more from Michigan

mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.

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(806): View more from Texas

Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother

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(703): View more from Virginia

She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.

(540): View more from Virginia

Ew, and?!

(703): View more from Virginia

Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.

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(813): View more from Florida

Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida

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25 People Didn’t Realize They Were Talking To Someone Famous
Read it at the TFLN blog
(314): View more from Missouri

Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.

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(305): View more from Florida

once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away

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(315): View more from New York

at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache

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(585): View more from New York

Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?

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(310): View more from California

I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.

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