Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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