at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
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