i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
