He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
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