Texts From Last Night

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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you

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  (604): it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you http://tfl.nu/0wg6
  Replies (12) Good night (3800) Bad night (575)
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  (319): View more from Iowa

  Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"

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  (319): Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in" http://tfl.nu/15za
  Replies (64) Good night (5388) Bad night (1130)
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.

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  (860): i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college. http://tfl.nu/169r
  Replies (81) Good night (8382) Bad night (1137)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.

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  (215): i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history. http://tfl.nu/28mn
  Replies (12) Good night (2795) Bad night (1112)
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  (830): View more from Texas

  just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao

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  (830): just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao http://tfl.nu/019w
  Replies (17) Good night (4055) Bad night (1163)
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  (602): View more from Arizona

  So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.

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  (602): So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better. http://tfl.nu/qcgw
  Replies (79) Good night (4076) Bad night (7779)
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  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.

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  (413): i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list. http://tfl.nu/l7yl
  Replies (15) Good night (4927) Bad night (915)
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  (914): View more from New York

  right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"

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  (914): right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit" http://tfl.nu/7x3l
  Replies (6) Good night (3261) Bad night (901)
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  (810): View more from Michigan

  We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.

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  (810): We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock. http://tfl.nu/wrss
  Replies (14) Good night (3451) Bad night (765)
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.

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  (403): You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark. http://tfl.nu/dx9e
  Replies (17) Good night (2304) Bad night (682)
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  (530): View more from California

  Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.

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  (530): Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking. http://tfl.nu/izw9
  Replies (8) Good night (1492) Bad night (669)
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  (289): View more from Ontario

  This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.

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  (289): This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break. http://tfl.nu/v46r
  Replies (4) Good night (905) Bad night (474)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now

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  (303): Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now http://tfl.nu/ssv3
  Replies (5) Good night (618) Bad night (936)
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  (336): View more from North Carolina

  Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?

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  (336): Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up? http://tfl.nu/j9qb
  Replies (4) Good night (779) Bad night (378)
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  (701): View more from North Dakota

  When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."

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  (701): When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough." http://tfl.nu/8x3m
  Replies (3) Good night (483) Bad night (238)

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