everyone is single if you try hard enough
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
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