we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
There's even glitter on my cock...
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