Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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