I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
These 31 People Are Lazier Than You Could Ever Imagine
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
27 Drunk People That Pissed Off The Cops And Got What They Deserved
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.