If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass