plz talk dirty to me
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.