Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
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