and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
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